An Evangelical Counsel

Fourth Sunday in Ordinary Time
    Probably one of the most common questions I get, especially after people gain more ease and confidence in asking a priest questions, is some why I chose the priesthood when it meant that I wouldn’t have a family of my own.  It’s a great question, and given our second reading today, I want to look at virginity, celibacy, and chastity.
    Chastity is the virtue the governs our sexual desires.  A lot of people think chastity means that you don’t have sex.  They confuse it with celibacy.  But chastity is a virtue for every Catholic, and simply means that we’re using our sexuality appropriately: if we’re single, no sexual activity at all or even misusing our sexuality by ourselves; if we’re married (and marriage is only between a man and a woman), only having sexual activity with one’s spouse, and only that which is loving, unitive, and open to life.  So a husband and a wife can be chaste (c-h-a-s-t-e) when they are trying to conceive a child together and engaging in the activity by which children are conceived. 
    Chastity is one of the evangelical counsels (chastity, poverty, and obedience) which can be vowed for one’s personal sanctification.  Vows are for the sanctification of the individual, though they also benefit the Church.  A vow of chastity is usually made when one becomes a member of a religious institution, like the Dominicans, Franciscans, or Benedictines, and means that a person will live as a single person for the rest of his or her life. 
    Chastity is one of the virtues that many people struggle with today, as the misuse of sexual activity, which includes using another person simply for one’s gratification, whether in person or online, runs rampant and society often praises unchastity.  But chastity is for everyone who follows Christ, not just those who make a vow of chastity.
    Celibacy is a promise made to God through the Church to abstain from anything proper to the married state, or even dating, and to practice the virtue of chastity as a single person.  Single people who are not dating, or who are dating but not engaging in sexual activity, are not celibate; they are chaste.  Celibacy, as a promise, is for the benefit of the Church, just like other promises made are for the benefit of the Church (marriage vows are technically marriage promises, since they are for the good of the Church).  During my ordination Mass to the diaconate, I made a promise to God, through Bishop Boyea, to live celibacy as a witness to the kingdom.  That promise can only be dispensed by the pope or his representatives in Rome.
    Virginity is the state where one has not engaged in sexual activity at all.  It can be simply the reality of a person’s life (as in a young person who has never committed the sin of fornication or adultery).  Or it can be made as a vow by someone through consecration.  While one may be able to regain virginity in a spiritual way, physical virginity cannot be regained once lost, whether for males or females.  One does not have to be a virgin to promise celibacy, as some priests have lived an unchaste life before they were ordained, then had a conversion, and then promised celibacy at ordination. 
    So what does all of this mean?  And why did St. Paul say what he did in the second reading, about the unmarried man or woman being anxious about the things of the Lord and so on?  Some see celibacy or virginity simply in a practical light, and our reading might seem to suggest that at first.  St. Paul talks about how a person who is unmarried, whether a celibate or a virgin, concerns him or herself with the things of the Lord.  And I will certainly say that, while there is a part of me that would like to be married and enjoy physical relations with a wife, and conceive children, I can’t imagine having to care for a family and a parish.  There are Catholic priests who are legitimately married and then become priests, mostly Eastern Rite Catholics, and I don’t know how they do it.  I don’t even have enough time for a dog, let alone a wife and kids! 
    But celibacy and virginity is not simply about practicalities.  Celibacy and virginity witness to the heavenly life, where, as Christ says, there is no marrying and giving in marriage.  Why not?  Because in heaven, we are focused most intently on God and worshiping Him.  This is not to say that we’ll have amnesia in heaven about a spouse if a person was married on earth.  But that special relationship of marriage, which is meant to witness the life of the Trinity on earth, is no longer necessary, because in heaven we behold the Trinity face to face in the beatific vision.  There are no sacraments in heaven, because we don’t need physical realities to communicate the spiritual realities of God; we receive the spiritual realities or mysteries of God directly, unmediated. 
    Those who promise or vow themselves to focus directly on God are reminding us that, even though marriage is very good, and not just because it creates children who increase the size of the Church, even family comes second to God, and in heaven we will rely totally on God for our happiness, whether it be in our sexuality (the vow of chastity), our possessions (the vow of poverty), or even our will (the vow of obedience).  This is why consecrated life, those who vow the three evangelical counsels of chastity, poverty, and obedience, is, in one sense, the highest form of life on earth, because it most perfectly (in an objective sense) imitates the life of heaven while still on earth.  That is why the Church so often praises virgins, especially the Blessed Virgin Mary, because they dedicated themselves entirely to God, which is something we all hope to do in heaven.

    Having said that, a happy married couple can be holier than a grumpy monk, nun, priest, or bishop in a subjective sense.  God calls each of us to different vocations, and we shouldn’t strive for one vocation just because it’s objectively higher.  We should strive for the vocation that is subjectively suited for us, because that is how God wants us to be saints.
    And, for all people, the virtue of chastity still applies, because it properly orders our precious gift of sexuality according to the plan of God, whether that plan for us is marriage, celibacy, or virginity.  All people can be saints, and part of being a saint is integrating our sexual drive into the vocation to which God has called us.  May we all be chaste–whether priest, married couple, or single individual–and seek to follow God through the vocation to which He has called us so that we might enter heaven and enjoy eternal happiness and fulfillment by worshipping God for eternity.

"We need to talk..."

Twenty-first Sunday in Ordinary Time

           

There are certain phrases in life that you never want to hear from a person.  If you are a student you never want to have the teacher tell you, “See me after class.”  If you’re dating someone, you never want to hear, “We need to talk.”  If you’re meeting with your doctor, you never want to hear, “We found something that we didn’t expect.”  All those things generally mean that there is some bad news coming, whether it’s a poor grade on a test, a break-up, or an illness or disease that was just discovered.

            At the end of our life, standing before the judgment seat of God, we don’t want to hear, “‘I do not know where you are from,’” coming from the mouth of Jesus.  That means that what comes next is not good news, and we should be prepared for the afterlife elevator to go down, rather than up.  So it makes sense that the person might say, as Jesus has them saying in today’s Gospel, “‘We ate and drank in your company and you taught in our streets.’”  But then they hear something even worse: “‘I do not know where you are from.  Depart from me, all you evildoers!’”  These probably sound like pretty harsh words from the Divine Person who is supposed to be a loving Shepherd.

            But both last week and this week the Church presents for us what can seem like the harsher side of Jesus.  Last week Jesus was saying how following Him will split apart families.  This week, He’s talking about eternal salvation and how many will be saved.  When we hear passages like the one we heard today, perhaps we try to theologize it away, by highlighting other passages from Scripture which talk about how God desires the salvation of all.  And certainly we take those very seriously and must read today’s passage in light of those.  But more often than not, we don’t read this passage in light of those other Scripture passages, we just ignore today’s and pretend that the one’s about God’s desire for all to be saved are the only passages that are important.  But we do so at our own peril.

            Because while God does desire all to be saved, God also tells us with great sobriety that “‘many…will attempt to enter [through the narrow gate] but will not be strong enough.’”  Enjoying eternal bliss is not the automatic destination, even one of one who is baptized.  It’s the destination God programmed into us, but sin so often takes us off course.  Just because we’re baptized doesn’t mean that we’re going to heaven.  Salvation is not a gift that is offered once for all and accepted or rejected in one moment, but is a gift that is offered to us each day that we have to receive each day in order for it to become our eternal reality.  Just because I lived a holy life yesterday, does not mean that I will today.  In fact, I could be particularly evil today, which could undermine all the good I did yesterday. 

            If you think about it in an academic metaphor, we don’t start class off with a 4.0, and then only lose it if we don’t turn stuff in, or answer questions correctly.  Rather, God offers us opportunities to respond to the love He first showed us, homework assignments and quizzes and tests, and if we do well, we can get that 4.0.  Or, if you prefer, think about it in terms of lifting weights.  We don’t start off with buff little bodies.  We need to work out in order to keep a good, muscular physique.  When we don’t, our muscles get weak and they appear smaller.  I’m living proof of that.  If muscles just came, I’d be pretty buff.  But because I never lifted weights or did any kind of muscle conditioning, I have these little scrawny arms.  Now, good grades are not the most important things in life, nor are muscles.  But what is true with getting a 4.0 and getting big muscles is true about salvation: it doesn’t just happen without any work. 

            It is not enough to be around Jesus, as if salvation comes by way of osmosis.  We might as well sleep with textbooks beneath our pillow in the hopes of learning the material.  The people in Jesus’ words today were around Jesus.  They ate and drank with Him and He taught them in their cities.  And yet Jesus says He does not know them.  It is not enough simply that we are baptized.  Each day we are called to respond to God’s love that He give us first, and the opportunities that He sends our way to share that love with others.  Each day we are called to offer to God the sacrifice of our lives as we seek to do His will in all things.  We discipline ourselves to choose God not ourselves; to choose love, not hate; to choose generosity, not selfishness; to choose truth, not lies.  Baptism is not a Get Out of Hell Free card.  It is, rather, a catalyst that can be used to propel us towards heaven.  Or it can just sit on a shelf and collect dust. 

            The work of the New Evangelization is to reenergize our own faith, and to bring others back into the practice of the faith in which they were baptized, to work out those spiritual muscles.  And our impetus in doing so is because we want them to go to heaven, just as much as we want to go to heaven.  And we know for them, as for ourselves, that the gate to heaven is not wide, but narrow, and the way to heaven is not the easiest path, but often is the hardest, and that new life in God comes only through death to ourselves.  It means that we form our minds around what God has revealed to us, rather than doing our own thing.  It means we go to Mass every Sunday and Holyday; we give of our time, talent, and treasure to the Church; that we talk about our faith in public and pass it on to our families and friends; that we live a life of chastity; that marriages for Catholics happen according to the laws of God and the Church; that we feed the hungry and give drink to the thirsty; that we do all this and more according to our abilities.  I pray that I, and all of us, and all those to whom we as a parish are called to evangelize, are not spiritually lazy, but do the hard work of responding to God’s love in everyday life, so that when we die, we will not hear, “I do not know where you are from.  Depart from me, evildoers!” but, “Come, my good and faithful servant; share your Master’s joy.”