18 September 2012

Throw Your Life Away!!


Twenty-Fourth Sunday in Ordinary Time
            As a seminarian, it was not uncommon to hear people talk about certain seminarians, and say, “Why is so-and-so throwing his life away?  He has such great potential!”  Bishop Mengeling, when we were on retreat as seminarians, would sometimes use that phrase to remind us of what we were doing with a twist, that we were truly throwing our life away for the Lord, just as a married couple throws their life away for each other.
            We often don’t think of throwing our life away as a positive thing.  That’s not the phrase we use to celebrate big events like an ordination, or a wedding (though the phrase may be tossed around at bachelor or bachelorette parties, or by heartbroken girls who would rather have a seminarian as the father of their children instead of being a spiritual father).    It generally has a negative connotation, as if we are wasting some sort of potential.  And yet, in our Gospel, the Lord is very clear: “‘whoever wishes to save his life will lose it, but whoever loses his life for my sake and that of the gospel will save it.’”  It is as if Jesus is saying, “If you try not to throw away your life, you will, but if you throw away your life for me, you will truly preserve it.”
            When a man and woman pledge themselves to each other as husband and wife; or when a man is called to be a priest and responds to that call; or when a man or a woman respond to the call to be consecrated for the sake of the Kingdom; all those people are throwing away their lives.  The married couple is promising to stop looking for someone better with whom to share their entire life and with whom to have children.  The priest is promising to devote his life first and foremost to God, so that he can serve His people.  The consecrated man or woman is promising to devote him or herself to Christ and be a witness of what life will be like in the Kingdom of Heaven, especially through witnessing the evangelical counsels of chastity, poverty, and obedience in imitation of Jesus who was chaste, poor, and obedient. 
They are throwing away other opportunities that could have come up in their life in the future.  The husbands are throwing away the possibility that they will meet another woman, and the wives are throwing away the possibility that they will meet another man, who will be a suitable partner, a lifelong companion, and the person with whom they want to share physical intimacy and raise children.  The priest is throwing away the possibility of marriage and having biological children of his own so that he can have deep intimacy with Christ and be the caretaker of His bride, the Church.  The consecrated man or woman is throwing away the possibility of being a father or a mother, and, in the case of men and women religious, is throwing away the accumulation of wealth and the ability to direct their lives how they want, and when they want, and where they want.
And yet, as proof of what Jesus says (in case we don’t take Him at His word), the happiest people I have met are those who have thrown away their lives and not looked back.  I see it in couples that have been married, for example, for 50 years, who have spent a lifetime together, struggling to make ends meet, to raise children, to live out their faith, and while things haven’t always been easy, they always, without fail, say to me that they would do the same all over again if they had the chance.  I see it in the consecrated men and women, like Judith Stegman, a consecrated virgin, or Sr. Dorothy, our Director of Campus Ministry, or Sr. Liz, our Director of Senior Ministry, in the joy that they have found in consecrating their lives to Christ.  And I also see the overwhelming majority of my brother priests, who, though they have left all to follow Christ and serve His people, are already receiving 100-fold for what they have left behind.
What concerns me a little is that our culture does not encourage us to throw everything away for marriage, or consecrated life, or priesthood.  Whether it’s middle or high school students, or the college students at MSU, or even adults, so many are afraid to make any commitment, just in case there’s something better around the corner.  As a culture, we are afraid of commitment because it means that we may have to give up the future goods that we think we might possibly get by holding out.  Even in marriage, there is a general societal view that, if things don’t work out, you can always break it off in case you find something or someone better.  We see it especially in couples living together while dating or engaged, pretending to live a married life with each other under the same roof, in the same bed, but free to call it off in case something better comes along.  Only in marriage is that decision to throw it all away for the other protected, because both spouses commit to that marital love for the entire duration of their lives.  And sadly, Jesus’ words ring true that those who try to save it all, end up losing it.  Some studies state that 67%, or 2 out of 3 couples that live together before marriage, end up divorcing, and that it’s often in the first decade of their marriage. 
Is throwing it all away easy?  Certainly not.  There are times when a couple, or a consecrated man or woman, or a priest, feels the weight of the cross.  There are times when disciples have to experience people who metaphorically beat their back, or pluck their beard, or spit on their face.  But, when we throw it away, with God’s help, when we lose our life for the Son of Man and the gospel, then we can say with the prophet Isaiah from our first reading, “The Lord God is my help, therefore I am not disgraced; I have set my face like flint, knowing that I shall not be put to shame…See, the Lord God is my help.”  When we lose our life for the sake of Jesus and the Gospel, it is then that we, in fact, find it, and save it for eternal life.