Twenty-Seventh Sunday in Ordinary Time
If
there’s one gift that I admire in people, it’s the gift of being an artist; of
being able to take pencils, or crayons, or paints, or charcoal and create an
image that truly looks like something, whether it’s a landscape, a person, or a
scene. Try as I might, I just
don’t have that gift. The best I
can do is stick figures and basic shapes, and they never seem to look like what
I am imagining or picturing in my head, no matter how hard I try.
When
a piece of art looks like what it represents, it’s easy to tell the
correlation. When the art doesn’t
look like what it represents, it’s difficult to find the correlation. When an artist paints the Coliseum in
Rome, you can tell what it is. Why
I try to draw the Coliseum, it could be a bathtub, a strainer, or just a blob.
Jesus’
teaching today on marriage is all about correlation. Marriage is meant to be an icon, and image, or something
else. And we see that in the
beginning in Genesis. Adam and Eve
are created to be a communion of persons.
They are not simply to be two persons who happen to be in the same area,
but they are meant to be joined in a relationship. “‘It is not good for the man to be alone,’” God says, and so
he makes Eve for Adam. But Adam
recognizes that this is not simply a second, but a part of him. “‘This one, at last,’” Adam says, “‘is
bone of my bones and flesh of my flesh.’”
The two are meant for each other.
And in that first couple, we see the design of marriage, as the sacred
author says at the end, “That is why a man leaves his father and mother and
clings to his wife, and the two of them become one flesh.”
But
what are Adam and Eve, two persons but joined as one flesh, meant to
represent? They are the icon of
the God’s relationship with humanity.
Adam and Eve are meant to be a physical representation in their marriage
of God and human nature. Just as Jesus
is one Person, so Adam and Eve are both human. And, just as Jesus has two distinct natures, so Adam and Eve
retain their individuality.
Of course, an icon is an image; it is not the same. And there are differences between the relationship
between God and humanity and Adam and Eve. But Adam and Eve are an image of the communion of marriage
of God to humanity.
Through
the years, after the Fall of Adam and Eve, that image became marred. It’s as if Fr. Anthony started to draw
the image. Yes, it had some
resemblances to the original, but there were flaws. Whereas God’s original plan was for one man and one woman to
be joined as one flesh for life, very soon after the Fall men and women started
to abuse the gift of their sexuality and so marred the image of marriage. It was no longer one man and one woman,
but maybe one man and lots of women.
And even in the Law given through Moses, while adultery is clearly forbidden
(the Sixth Commandment), still, divorce is allowed by Moses, and the image of
God’s communion of Persons is still not quite an accurate portrayal.
But
Jesus, the full revelation of the Father, the new Moses, cleans up the
image. He reminds the Pharisees
that the husband and wife are not two, but one flesh, and what God has joined
cannot be separated (unless, as in the passage from the Gospel according to St.
Matthew, the marriage is not valid from the start). Jesus calls the Chosen People back to the idea of radical
fidelity, even in the face of unfaithfulness. That is the message of almost all the prophets, who remind
Israel that she is the Bride of God, and that she has been unfaithful. But God, for His part, never abandoned
her, and remains faithful for all time.
That image of marriage is based upon God Himself, who took to Himself a
human nature, and will never separate or divorce that human nature from
Himself. He is one flesh with
humanity. And so Jesus
says there this is no such thing as divorce from God’s perspective.
This
is a tough teaching because it is a difficult image to live up to. But that is precisely what marriage
represents: the relationship between Jesus and humanity. That is why preparation for marriage is
so important, so that the union of a man and a woman is an accurate
representation of the marriage of the divine to the human in Jesus Christ. That is why it is so important for
married couples to support each other, especially in difficult times, to remain
faithful to their vows and to that image, as long as it does not endanger a
person’s spiritual, mental, or emotional well-being. The Church certainly does not want a spouse to be a punching
bag, and sometimes separation is necessary. Sometimes there was something that was missing from the
marriage from the start, which may or may not have been known. That is why the Church grants
Declarations of Invalidity, or annulments, to recognize that what was necessary
for that image to even be crafted may not have been there. It does not illegitimate any of the
aspects that looked like a real marriage, including the children, but it does
recognize that something necessary was missing.
To
all those who have civil divorces in our community: while we cannot change
Jesus’ teaching, we can also emphasize that Jesus still loves you and wants you
as a part of His Body, the Church.
I have too often heard from people who have felt that because they are
divorced (even though they are not civilly remarried) they cannot participate
in the life of the Church. That is
the farthest from the truth. As
long as you are not doing anything which is improper for a married person, if
you are divorced, you are still welcome to present yourself for all the
sacraments, especially the Eucharist.
And whether you have or have not attempted remarriage outside of the
Church, do not be afraid to come and meet with a priest to try to regularize
your situation and obtain a declaration of invalidity. Especially if you have attempted
remarriage, Fr. Mark and I want to help you so that you can once again return
to the sacramental life of the Church.
The
Church’s teaching on marriage can seem hard. It can seem to many to be out of date and punitive. But what the Church teaches is what
Jesus teaches: that marriage is not just about one man and one woman becoming
one flesh. That union is meant to
symbolize the bond of one human nature and one Divine nature in the one Divine
Person of Jesus, a bond which Jesus will never separate, because God has joined
them together. Let us support each
other, especially married couples, in living out that icon of love, so that the
image is clear and recognizable of the unending and unbreakable bond of love of
God with humanity.